Saturday, February 03, 2007

Losing People (to the friends I thought I had, especially one)

I never thought that I could let myself lose friends easily. I hold onto every memory. Every conversation, argument and giggles and tears.

I cant let go easily because I thought that person cared too. Its tough. But I cant compromise on the truth, my self-respect, their stupidity and immaturity and my principles.

When time passes by us during a fight and moments of harsh venom filled words are exchanged, time really stands still. At that point u want to tell yourself that this isn’t real and tomorrow she’ll call u again and laugh about this. But the truth is she wont. Nor will I.

Since the past 3 years I’ve lost ‘’friends’’ who I was close to. Girls who shared my secrets and I shared theirs. It takes years to build love and respect. How can a few misunderstandings and fights erase everything. But the fact is, it does.

Those close to me have comforted me and some of their words made a lot of sense –

“People come into our lives for a particular time. When they leave its their time to leave. No matter what u do, u can never bring them back. No matter how hard u try.”

“Those who don’t stick by you, are just not worth it.”

I was listening to Nelly Furtado’s ‘why do all good things come to an end?’ and felt sad for a while. But then I realised something today in the shower. Where I felt the water trickling through me… around me , over me, healing me.. and like most of us, I felt comfort there.

I realised that if it really was a good thing… it would never end. Never…