Saturday, December 08, 2007

another one heheheh....

You're Part Diva

You know that a girl's gotta work it to get her way in the world.
And while you aren't about to throw a tantrum at every turn...
You do amp up the drama when you know you need it.
You mix charm, honesty, and kindness to get ahead.


You Are a Gingerbread House

A little spicy and a little sweet, anyone would like to be lost in the woods with you.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Ode to my grandfather

I dont know if you were ready or weren't.
I dont think you nor us could ever have prepared ourselves for this.

I hope you are happy dadu.
Happy where you are.
Happy with those people who filled your youth and old age with joy.

I was in shock, then grief, and now Im passing in between these two phases.

But I'll be fine. I'll be happy to know you are happy.
Thats all that matters.

May your soul be at peace.
You are always in my heart.
I hope I made you proud and happy.

Yours always -


In loving memory of my grandfather, who passed away on 14th September, 2007

Your life is an inspiration for us to be brave, ambitious, joyous and loving.
Your ever-giving and open heart that was ready to help anyone will always be remembered and we hope to follow your footsteps.
You touched the lives of many and was loved by many many people across the country and the world.
Dadu, you left us on a festival day, a friday,and it was so quick and even though u suffered it was shorter than most people who suffer for months and years. These facts show that you were a great person who did good karma.You were so good and so kind.
Thankyou for everything.
Thankyou for teaching us so many things.
I love you. Im so proud u were my grandfather.
We love you.
We were blessed to have you among us.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

The oddity of being me

Its my weakness. Its my pride.
Its everything. Its nothing.
It never ends. It ceases when challenged.
Its big. Its small.
Its my asset. Its my fault.
Its my hope. Its my misery.
It fools me. I fool it.
Its a paradox.
Its love. Or is it?

Saturday, September 01, 2007

Magic :)

(To poo, wrote it long back.)

I looked up at the night sky.
I saw the stars.
I saw your smile.
I saw the moon.
I remembered your eyes.
I looked around the silent night.

Alone but with you.
Asleep but awake in you.

I never want to let go of this magic.
I'm holding this ball of fire.
Carressing it between my palms
Gently touching it and feeling its warmth.

Its glowing next to my cheek.
I smile.
I'm hugging it.
This dynamic living breathing thing, so beautiful;
oblivious to everything tangible or intangible.

I throw it up.
It shatters the dark sky into golden stars.
Spreading above me.
I laugh as I stretch my hands out.

Gold dust around me,
feeling the essence of my creation.

How long will they light my sky?
Only time will tell, my love.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Nothing complicated about it!

Life is simple...

I wish it was always that easy to bracket things as 'easy'... lol

However recently I was facing alot of stress and problems in dealing with people and situations etc...but I learned from dear ones and myself... that letting go is the key to looking at every situation as a simple problem...

Its not that I dont care... I'm learning not to care toooo much! :P I

Monday, May 28, 2007

The Beautiful Irony

Due to the water shortage in Bangalore, esp in my locality.. we've been trying to economise our water usage. We now pump water from our well for non-edible purposes. Quite alot of work if one has to do it daily... but we are all used to it by now. We've been doing it for nearly 2-3 months now...

So the other day when it we had a downpour in Bangalore for nearly 2 hours, all over the city.
I couldnt help thinking :

"What alot of water is going waste!"

Then I caught myself horrified!!


And look at me... worried about even enjoying it. But thats what its come to!

BUT!this was when the downpour occurred, when I was travelling by car.

The day before that...when I was at home.. and it just rained.. moderately ...

I saw the most beautiful sight... :)

Colours of the rain

Green... greeen... lush greens... wet.. shining... singing... whistling... swaying.

My neem tree swayed and her large hairdo was ruffled and shaken..

My christmas tree stood as tall as possible.. but shook a bit.. (I giggled as I personified them)

My maroon car stood wet and shiny... brand new.. looking happy.
Yes I felt their happiness too.

The road ... dark, silver, greyish, black...

I felt dreamy... felt good.. Felt the wind.
The chill

The pleasant chill.


The water sprayed at me through the window.

I smiled. Kept smiling.

Friday, May 25, 2007


Dynamic lives.

Back to where it all started.

Walls cant be built anymore,
but emotions can.

Ground zero- no expectations.

I had learnt not to have any.
I had thought that was for loose times... thin strings..
Not thick and strong ones...
Boy was I dreaming?

I thought we had passed the ground level.... passed ground zero.

Now its back again....

Zero expectations.

There are very few people in this world who do things for people. I dunno why I was born in that category. I should be self-centered again.


Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Bitter Bites


But it wasn’t that shocking… déjà vu

As I dug my teeth into the bitter moment…..

I thought…is there no logic and no reason,

for this bitterness to exist?

Mistakes.. done to me

Even I make them.

I know I’ll move past it… but it takes a while..

Sometimes its weird that I wish people see things

the way I do.

React like me.. feel like me…especially those close to me..

Be sensitive towards me.. like I would towards them.

But then that’s not possible.. cause everyone is not you.

Why does everything taste so bitter. I didn’t want such a huge bite.

Take it away from my face..

I need water

Saturday, April 28, 2007

No Kidding around.....

I just realised.. now that Im outta college and everything...


No !!!

I wanna stay a kid.. well kid in college.. not a kid in the big BAD world! :(

I know I sound like a chicken.



Work.. is understandable... but planning where I am gonna be 5 years from now.. is scaring me!!!


Saturday, April 14, 2007

Secret garden

(to them.. who gave me life)


Lies I have to tell you.

My secret garden.

How safe and unfraid.

How far away from you.

I’ve left you in the dark.

You made me do this.

Made me hide.

Im hiding my joy.

Hiding my hopes,dreams,castles in the air.

Away from your ‘fears’ and ‘love’

Away from your consciousness.



Because I’ll never know any other way.

Hiding… yet I want to share…

Maybe one day you will let me.

Please stop me from hiding.

Saturday, March 10, 2007


Especially to my family who made it a memorable one...

I’ve been wanting to blog about my birthday, but somehow words don’t fit the emotions I experienced. The love I received in terms of the wishes, the gifts , the smiles and the hugs is unexplainable.

The love I felt this 20th birthday was something I never expected. I’ve never been the type who plans her bday and party etc months ahead (my own sister does that lol.. ), somehow I never felt like planning. This time , I had planned, but the people on my list kept changing, and finally chose few of those who’ve been by my side, who’ve been a friend, and most importantly people I like :)

Irrespective of my friends changing, friends from my past somehow have a soft corner in my heart, and I decided to break the barriers and let me indulge in their company again.. like old times.. and tho playing a host gave me very little time with everyone, I was glad to see everyone enjoying and bonding! Gave me smiles too. Unfortunately the pics I took were last min and blurry… I forgot about camera till everyone got ready to leave!!

I cant describe the best gift cause a lot of them have very special and warm sentiments attached…

But one of them really got me crying was from my sis, Ishu and my family too.. tho I think primarily it was my lil sweetie’s idea.. they got me calendar with my childhood photos, when I was a baby and as I grew older…with each member of my family… was really sweet. Something I didn’t expect!! *sniff*

I got a real special perfume, from a really special someone *hugs* … cause that someone knew how I used to go to the mall and spray testers and sigh and rave and rant about Elizabeth Arden and when a ‘dream’ like that comes true, u dunno what to say. Esp when u with that person, and ur being asked to take it at the perfume store. I was speechless. Not used to dreams like that coming true… end up buying for someone else always.. pampering myself is tough!

Surprisingly three of my friends took up a similar idea as my sis, and gave me collage of photos with memorable moments. *sweet*

One of my friends, flew down from another city, just for my birthday! *------------* cant describe the emotions--- shock,awe,gratitude etc..etc! I mean she came down just for me :) its something I’ll never forget, for the rest of my life !

I got books,shoes,clothes, and perfumes too… everything was sweet and anything I got made me happy cause I didn’t expect like proper gifts, knowing how broke we all get esp when it comes to buying gifts ;p

Well I had the birthday blues after that, maybe it was various things, but mostly I think I didn’t have enough of the special day :( lol… in a way its right to have one day when ur treated like a queen and in a way its not! But anything in excess would cause monotony and boredom.. so I shall let it be.. and smile when I think of my 20th bday :)

By the way,my 18th bday sucked-shattered the hype of the ‘grand’18 bday, and 19th wasn anything extraordinary…

This bday made me re-discover the joy in birthdays and gave me a lot moments to savor and reminisce… and my family really played a huge role in organizing and making it a successful and memorable day :)

As I grow older , I realise the value of home, family, relationships –good,bad,ugly, and that thing called….love!

Saturday, March 03, 2007

"Men spend their lives in anticipations,--in determining to be vastly happy at some period when they have time. But the present time has one advantage over every other--it is our own. Past opportunities are gone, future have not come. We may lay in a stock of pleasures, as we would lay in a stock of wine; but if we defer the tasting of them too long, we shall find that both are soured by age."

Charles Caleb Colton

When I read this quote I realised I've done it too... we should be happy NOW and live today for today ! :)

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Losing People (to the friends I thought I had, especially one)

I never thought that I could let myself lose friends easily. I hold onto every memory. Every conversation, argument and giggles and tears.

I cant let go easily because I thought that person cared too. Its tough. But I cant compromise on the truth, my self-respect, their stupidity and immaturity and my principles.

When time passes by us during a fight and moments of harsh venom filled words are exchanged, time really stands still. At that point u want to tell yourself that this isn’t real and tomorrow she’ll call u again and laugh about this. But the truth is she wont. Nor will I.

Since the past 3 years I’ve lost ‘’friends’’ who I was close to. Girls who shared my secrets and I shared theirs. It takes years to build love and respect. How can a few misunderstandings and fights erase everything. But the fact is, it does.

Those close to me have comforted me and some of their words made a lot of sense –

“People come into our lives for a particular time. When they leave its their time to leave. No matter what u do, u can never bring them back. No matter how hard u try.”

“Those who don’t stick by you, are just not worth it.”

I was listening to Nelly Furtado’s ‘why do all good things come to an end?’ and felt sad for a while. But then I realised something today in the shower. Where I felt the water trickling through me… around me , over me, healing me.. and like most of us, I felt comfort there.

I realised that if it really was a good thing… it would never end. Never…